On the first day of the apocalypse Mar-a-Lardo gave to us
eggs we can’t afford in a cut down redwood tree
On the second day of catastrophe Dolt 45 gave to us
too too many layoffs (and firings and forced retirings)
On the third day of Armageddon Tangerine Palpatine gave to us
three times ten thousand homeless vets
On the forth day of doomsday The Slob Father gave to us
four new wars with long time good friends (only 4 for now, but I’m sure that’s just a start)
On the fifth day of Ragnarok Butternut Burlusconi gave to us
five new climate driven natural disasters (at least)
On the sixth day of Judgment Hair Farce One gave to us
six hidden deals with Russian enemies (that’s funny becaues they aren’t hidden, I just needed some extra syllables so it read easier)
On the seventh day of the end times Waxed Gritty gave to us
seven slimy cabinet members (there are really 25 but the other have different adjectives like corrupt, amoral, unscrupulous, deceitful, you get the picture)
On the eighth day of dystopia Oaf of Office gave to us
eight million from foreign governments during his first term in office, oh wait, he kept that – never you mind that
On the ninth day of calamity Comrade Im-Peach gave to us
nine judges throwing humanity under the bus (more than just nine judges, I mean look at all the toadies in the executive and legislative branches joining in the cheering at the fall of democracy)
* nicknames credited to #hewhoshallbenamed segment on The Late Show with Stephen Colbert
Sparks 